Thanksgiving Service: From Toxic Positivity to True Gratitude
A service to express anger and hurt while also embracing what is good
It’s been one year since I posted my first post on Substack and the topic was “What are you NOT grateful for”. You can read that post here:
Tomorrow I am excited to be facilitating a Thanksgiving service where we will be gathering near the ocean and tossing stones that symbolize all of the things that we are not grateful for. This will be an expression of anger and hurt for anyone who needs that. We will have a brief message about tapping into true gratitude and then an art activity to bring a visual representation to one thing we are truly grateful for.
We have the great honor that an MFJ member has volunteered to play singing bowls for us.
Here is an image of the bowls sitting on a porch looking out into a neighborhood sunrise. Taken by Sarah.
This service is open to anyone who is interested and will take place outside of Hs. Lordships (closed restaurant) at
199 Seawall Dr. Berkeley, CA.
It will be on Thanksgiving Day from 10am-11am
Also on Zoom on Saturday, November 25th 10-11am.
Please email crystalsmultifaceted@protonmail.com for the link.
For those who prefer to do something at home perhaps you’d like to spend some time writing or doing some art around what you are not grateful for. The image or words can either be burnt or torn or saved. Some people use jars to put worries in, others have symbolized giving them over to a higher power. We more often hear of spiritual practices of gratitude than we do of being not grateful, but I think that there is a place for both and often giving space to the pain, anger, fear, and grief can open us up to the experience of true gratitude. When I tell someone what I’m not grateful for, I find that often my next thought is a lesson learned, or a flip side of whatever is causing me grief. For example: I’m not grateful that my car leaks when it rains and I am grateful that I have a car. I can be frustrated and annoyed while at the same time feel the gratitude I have for the freedom that a car brings. Both can be true at the same time. I don’t have to choose.
For a gratitude practice I’ve found that I get a lot out of choosing one thing and really tuning into the feelings that come when I think of something I’m grateful for. Quite often this is a person and most often it is my dog. You may want to find a flat stone and write the word or an image on the rock. The rock could be displayed for the year to be replaced with something you want to focus on next year. You may want to use water-color. Play with the paint and different washes and see what comes. Perhaps the painting itself will form into something surprising that will illustrate gratitude.
Whatever you are at either in a place of being grateful or being NOT grateful I am sending hopes for a beautiful and nourishing day.