Saturday Stories #2: A Secret Passageway
Writing Group, Berkeley Creative Wellness Center, May 8, 2015
Note: These fiction stories are unedited, unfiltered, and written in 15-25 minutes. Please be aware that they may contain intense material related to emotional healing, trauma recovery, and redirected fears. Please see my article “Coming Soon: Saturday Stories” for more information.
Story
I was walking in the woods when I noticed a large tree with a door in it. There was an eerie silence, no birds or insects to liven the forest. Just the sound of my own panting from walking up a large hill. I walked up to the door and not knowing what to do, I knocked. Nothing happened. I tried the handle, it was unlocked. I opened the door, but all I saw was darkness. Then I noticed a ladder that was going straight down into the darkness. I looked around and making sure to leave the door open began to climb down. My eyes adjusted just enough to see the rungs on the ladder. Down, down, I went. Then I got to an opening, a passage way that went straight into the dirt. It was just a little taller than I was. I held onto the ladder and stepped into it. I could see nothing. This I decided was very stupid.
I got down on my hands and knees. I would feel the ground before I proceeded onward. That way if there was a drop off I would be able to avoid it. Then I remembered my cell phone in my pocket. I pulled it out and turned it on. Light struck through the darkness and landed on several eyes looking at me. They belonged to a group of small children, crying silently, tears streaming down their faces.
“Come with me and I’ll get you out,” I said. They followed and I lead them to safety.
Today’s Insights
When I read this story today the ending scared me and I wondered what might come up for people, so thought to include the content warning at the beginning. I invite the reader to interpret this story as best fits. You could even continue it and see what comes up.
Looking at this story today I see an aspect of healing from complex trauma where the people in someone’s collective who hold emotions, memories, or experiences can be locked up and hidden away. It also tells a story of healing, because in this story those people didn’t have to be left there.
There is a need for caution in going down those secret or dark passageways. Yet, sometimes it’s what we need to do, even as the character in the story proceeded on while thinking “this I decided was very stupid.” Sometimes there’s an inner knowing that it’s the right thing to do even though there’s fear, just like sometimes there’s an inner knowing that it’s time to slow down and stop and come back with help. It can be overwhelming to discover one’s multiplicity, especially when you realize the depth of pain that is there. This is especially true if we don’t have the help from the outside that we need.
When I wrote this story, I was working with a skilled therapist who knew how to provide the support I needed. Many on this type of journey struggle to find someone who can help in this way. Sometimes when the support from the outside isn’t available we realize that we have resources that we didn’t remember or can use them in a new or different way. The character didn’t call for help in this story, she remembered that the phone also has a light that could get her through.
To anyone who feels alone and in the dark and afraid of what you might find there, I hope you find a light in your pocket and the resources needed to get through this time.